Messages from the Future

Messages From The Future

I know most of you don’t believe me.  You think this is just some ham-fisted literary contrivance designed to contextualize my “opinions”.  I can’t blame you. It makes no sense. How the hell could I be from the future?  It’s ridiculous of course and if I were you I wouldn’t believe me either.  So it’s with some amount of pained resignation that I assert…

But I am from the future, god damn it.  From a little under 20 years in the future actually.  I arrived on Feb 3rd, 2013, some time around 2:13. Before that, for me, it was July 3rd, 2033, at 2:33.  I know because I’d just checked my Apple Watch.

When I’m not wracking my brains for memories of which stocks were doing what and when (amazing how unprepared one can be for this), I’m documenting what I do remember here, in hopes that sharing this information doesn’t change too much of the future as I remember it.

 

VR Entertainment

July 4, 2016

VR was never on your phone. AR wasn’t entertainment. Oculus was just a peripheral company. That guy from the future tells you how Virtual Reality went down.

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The Decline of Apple

June 6, 2016

I’m sure you’ve had your own debates with the “Apple is about to die” crowd. I’ve had those too. Except that being from the future, of course I’m the only one who actually knows what I’m talking about.

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What Happened to Apple Watch

Feb 27, 2015

As some of you know by now, I am from the future.  And slightly annoyed to be here.  But anyway, this is what became of Apple Watch.

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The Fate of Google Glass

Feb 27, 2013

Man, time travel sucks. I mean think about it, you know all this stuff- and I mean you really know this stuff, but of course you can’t say, “You’re wrong. And I know, because I’m from the future.”

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My First Message From the Future: How Facebook Died

Feb 14, 2013

It was a hot, sunny Boston morning in July, 2033 – and suddenly – it was a freezing London evening in Feb 2013, and I had an excruciating headache. I have no clue what happened. No flash, no tunnel, no lights. It’s like the last 20 years of my life just never happened. Except that I remember them.

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